Saturday, December 12, 2009

Be a winner instead of a victim



With me, a lot of times, something undesirable happens and I start blaming people or circumstances just to make myself comfortable. I think of so many reasons to excuse myself and convince myself that I am not the one to blame. Sometimes, I even put the blame on my best friend, you call Him, God.

So, let’s see how I think and talk to myself:

– When the job market was bad, I said “I cannot find a job because of the bad job market. It’s tough to get a good package now.” I will wait for the job market to improve or wait for the next excuse I could think of. :)

– I am unhappy because my girl friend dumped me and I lost my job. I will just wait for some miracle to happen so that my girl friend and my job will come to me by its own.

– I lost the competition because the referee made a lousy call and gave some important points to my opponent. I lost interest and stopped playing. I will not play with those unfair people anymore.

– My love ones have lost faith in me. They think that I have let them down. They started believing on what others say. They don’t want to talk to me anymore. But why should it worry me. I have given my whole life for their sake. I don’t need to prove that I am right. I will not kneel down before anybody. I will not discuss any issue with them.

– If I can't think of any reason, I will simply think that my luck is bad. I will just wait for my luck to get better.


When you blame things on others, it makes you feel like a victim. You feel weak and powerless. You feel defeated. You feel like a victim of your destiny. Its fine to think of reasons. But if you take the responsibility of everything that happens to you (instead of blaming things on other people and circumstances) you will feel an immense power which will turn you from a victim into a winner. There is a lot of difference between taking the blame on youself and taking the responsibility. You never have to blame yourself for what is happening to you.

You don’t have the control on what happens to you but what distinguishes a winner from a loser is how you react to the things that happens to you. Someone has nicely define the 10:90 rule which states that you do not have control to the 10 percent of the things that happens to you but you have control on the 90 percent of what you do as you react to those situations. You have complete control on how you react to those things. Taking the responsibility makes you action oriented. You know it is you who have to do something about it instead of waiting for the situation or your luck to change. You will see your mind working toward the solution, towards making you a winner. You will be amazed with the power of your mind when you really want it to work for you.

Let’s see how your winner mind will think in the above situations when you take the responsibility,


– Job market is bad, I have to work harder to get a job.

– As my girl friend is not with me and I have lost my job, I have to find another girl friend and a job. Am I right? Better leave the girl friend, yes? But definitely, I will go find a job. :)

– I will work harder and will give my best. Losing and winning is part of life but giving your best is what matters. I have to work on my weak points. I have to point out if the referee is wrong and giving favor to opponent because of some reason. This would help prevent it from happening again, not only to me but to other players. Loosing the game has increase the adrenaline level in my blood. I will work hard.

– My love ones are my well wishers. They are disturbed as I am disturbed. They are sad as I am sad. They love me so much. It's just a bad phase of life. Talk to them and discuss my issues with them. Listen to them peacefully. Take some time and give others some time. One day, truth will prevail. Wait for the right time. The loved ones will become one soon.

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. (1 Cor. 13:4-8 NIV)

So from this time onward, when you see yourself thinking or talking about your excuses to put the blame on others, stop it right away. Irrespective of what situation you are in, take the responsibility of your life, take charge of your life and be a winner!!

As, rightly said by someone "Tough times don’t last but tough people do."

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. (James 1:2-4 NIV)

Friday, December 11, 2009

Are You Going To Finish Strong

hey doston...

I hope everybody is doing good .... may be not like me but better :)

One of friend sent me one link today and I really liked it too much ...

so I thought I should share this will you all as well...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VdsVA90QFck

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Life is Beautiful: Am I Joking :)



I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I've aged, I've become kinder to myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend. I don't chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying that silly cement gecko that I didn't need, but looks so avant garde on my patio. I am entitled to a treat, to be messy, to be extravagant.

I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.
Whose business is it if I choose to read or play on the computer until 4 AM and sleep until noon? I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 60 &70's, and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love ... I will.


I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the jet set. They, too, will get old.

I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten. And I eventually remember the important things.
Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when somebody's beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.


I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face.

So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn silver.


As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don't question myself anymore. I've even earned the right to be wrong.

So, to answer your question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be. And I shall eat dessert every single day(if I feel like it).

Hey what r u waiting for .... DESSERTS... sorry man..... Hard luck... I already had it all :)

enjoy... Life is beautiful.... yup .. that's true man....




ITS NOT MINE.... :):):):)... like it so post it... copy and paste :):);)

Monday, November 30, 2009

Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Badminton Tournament in Jeddah

Amazing …………….. How could it possible ….. A country where football, the crazy game, is the god or better said Ullah for everybody.. ..then how come you are talking about Badminton. ….

Yes, the same thought came to my mind when I came to know about this club. This club is situated near the one of the poshest and securest area of Jeddah… securest being as it is very near to American Embassy…… the so called VIP country of this world :)…..

I joined this club thinking that I would be able to pass my time and the other benefit was that I could skip the gym :) ...So I joined this club and start playing badminton with my office colleagues. I never thought that it was going to be so big. The club has 8 indoor badminton courts which I had never seen in any of the club in India. The court was so cleaned, too managed that I must say that it was one of the best clubs I had ever seen.

Here, I got the chance to know people from Pakistan, Indonesia, Philippines, Russia, British…. Now this place was doing two things for me … help me in improving my badminton game and the second I could know more people from all over the world. I can know there behavior, their culture, their liking and disliking….. a book which is still unopened for me….

I met with a Philippino guy here, aged around 40 who were playing good badminton game. We played together and then he offered me to join his group. He told me that I was playing good and I could improve my game and he will help me in this.

I joined his group, and learned a lot from him and the other team members of the group. Last Thursday, we had a badminton tournament (doubles) and I was playing from two categories. I really worked hard for the tournament and with the right help from my partners I won the championship in both the categories. Even I don’t know those medals and trophy matters for me or not, but one thing that effort and pain I took to learn the game, I respect that. I really respect those people who kept faith in me and my game and gave their best to help me in improving my game.

I am still playing twice or thrice a week…. Enjoying the company of my new friends…….. seeing their culture and absorbing good things from their culture… I think winning a championship was meager in front of the valuable time which I am spending with these new friends….…. ….…. I felt that I won something else which is important more that the championship……

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

SnOrKeLiNg


I have heard a lot about SnOrKeLiNg and here is my experience with the queen game...

My friends and I went to this excursion and here is my day on page..


We started early in the morning at around 7:00 AM. After picking all the friends, we start our journey towards the goal which we all wanted to experinec atleast once ...


If I did not mention about the car, we hired for our trip than its a sin toward the devil... the Pajero.. fully automatic Mitsubishi Pajero… the devil which has 3.8L 6 Cylinder, 24Valve, SOHC ECI-MIVEC Petrol Engine, HP @ 6,000 R.P.M 35.0 KG.M @ 2,750 R.P.M, 88 Liters Fuel Tank, Active stability control, ABS, Cruise 270 and much more....

It's really a devil… when I ran it at 120 miles/hour and tried skidding the car in mud, the control was sooooooo good that it make me its fan fun fan fun fan:) Its really a beautiful car ... anybody can fall in love with it;)


So after exploiting the devil fully (I am really amazed that I played with devil and he allowed me to do so) we reached the private beach at 9:30 AM .....
After a light breakfast, we all prepared ourselves to dive in the deeeeep Red sea. It was very calm and colorful. Indeed it looks special, very special.

We all left ourselves in the lap of sea…in the luke warm water.... we were feeling so comfortable in it (in the beginning though I was not)… I saw the beautiful colorful fishes…. red .. blue.. balck.... purple... green ..... orange... small and big fishes....... they were looking tooooooo great ... I tried to touch them but they just moved out and changed there path...... I saw corals which from above looks very soft… looked like flowers.. but in reality they were too hard like our life….. really... seeing all those things .. swiming with those lovely creatures which God has made .... seeing all those beauty which God has made.... I am really thankful to God who has sent me to Saudi Arabia, which people thinks (even i think till I came here) is a desert ... a country which is very rich in natural resources.... a coutry which has more than 26% oil of whole world yields..... where rich poeple lives... which is know for its hard customs..... But I found its all wrong information the people have ....... I will surely write more about this later... in my another blog...

We came back after 2 hours… in those two hours …. I have seen a new life … I swim with those lovely cute fishes which r so beautiful which I can never explain in words….. I was in a calm water which is saline but still it is giving life to so many species… … and might be sometimes it will rough as well.... like our loved ones to show us the right path.. right direction.. but still it keeps those species inside its lap.... .... really too good...
I found that the red sea is like our parents… so calm … it is like our relatives.. Who are always there to show us the right path… it is like our good friends who will not leave us in our bad time… … and more a mirage … as I saw many colors in water (due to corals)… red, blue … green…. And at the further end dark black deep water.. These colors represents the true color of life (happiness and sorrow)…

After coming back we had our Lunch which we brought with us... the food was really osum .. might be we all liked it as we all were very hungry at that time:)


After Lunch we played beach volley and really I played quite good or may be we all played pathetic:) ..... But at the end we all enjoyed and that what matters….

We rest for some time and after low tides were over (at least we felt so) we went for snorkelling again, but we found that water was still shallow and if we tried then might be we all will end up with some wounds which we could got by those lovely beautiful HARD corals. So after some time we came back.......

We rest for some time .... enjoyed watching others who were playing beach volley... and at around 6:00 PM when the sun was about to return to its home to sleep in the deeepp red sea assuming it is his mother's lap, we left back to our home... remebering the whole day we enjoyed togather ... and me recalling that life is something more about then thinking about life....


***************************************************************************************
Snorkeling is the practice of swimming on or through a body of water while equipped with a diving mask, a shaped tube called a snorkel, and usually swimfins. Using this equipment allows the snorkeler to observe underwater attractions for extended periods of time with relatively little effort.


It is a popular recreational activity, particularly at tropical resort and scuba diving locations. The primary attraction of snorkeling is the opportunity to observe underwater life in a natural setting without the complicated equipment and training required for scuba diving, in addition to the exhaled bubbles of scuba-diving equipment. Snorkeling is also a means to an end in popular sports such as underwater hockey, underwater ice hockey, underwater rugby and spearfishing.
So in general, Snorkeling is the act or sport of "sight seeing" at or just below sea level. Although donning a mask and snorkel and jumping into any body of water would technically constitute "snorkeling", by and large it is generally accepted that a "snorkeler" would don such gear and practice such activity within the vicinity of a reef, wreck, underwater formation or other submerged objects either to observe fish, plants, organisms and/or formations. Being non-competitive, it is less a sport and more a leisure activity.

The Red Sea is a salt water inlet of the Indian Ocean between Africa and Asia. The connection to the ocean is in the south through the Bab el Mandeb sound and the Gulf of Aden. In the north are the Sinai Peninsula, the Gulf of Aqaba, and the Gulf of Suez (leading to the Suez Canal). The Red Sea is a Global 200 ecoregion.
Occupying a part of the Great Rift Valley, the Red Sea has a surface area of about 438,000 km² (169,100 square miles ). It is roughly 2250 km (1398 mi) long and, at its widest point at 355 km (220.6 miles) wide. It has a maximum depth of 2211 m (7254 ft) in the central median trench and an average depth of 490 m (1,608 feet ), but there are also extensive shallow shelves, noted for their marine life and corals. The sea is the habitat of over 1,000 invertebrate species and 200 soft and hard corals and is the world's northernmost tropical sea.

The name of the sea may signify the seasonal blooms of the red-colored (Archabactera) Trichodesmium erythraeum near the water's surface. Some suggest that it refers to the mineral-rich red mountains nearby which are called Harei Edom. Edom, meaning "ruddy complexion", is also an alternative Hebrew name for the red-faced biblical character Esau (brother of Jacob), and the nation descended from him, the Edomites, which in turn provides yet another possible origin for Red Sea.

Note: The above information collected from internet.

Na koi saath aaya hai na koi saath jayegaan

Na koi saath aaya hai, na koi saath jayegaan…
...Na koi saath aaya hai, na koi saath jayegaan…

Yeh zindangi dekhlathi hai khel har dum naye naye…
Hum Sab bhag rahe hai lekar kadam bade bade…
Lekin yeh bhi nahi pata humkoon ..
ki is race mien kab tak main daud paongaan....

Na koi saath aaya tha, na koi saath jayegaan…

Dokha dena … jooth bolana.. lagta hai bada aaram sa ..
bura rasta deekhtha hi hai sabko aasaan sa …
Lekin yeh rasta bhi to ek din band ho jayegaan….
Uss din shayad koi nazar nahi aayegaan..
Shayad tu apni parchaai se bhi darr jayegaan..

Na koi saath aaya hai, na koi saath jayegaan…

Yeh jeevan ek khel hai…. Sab yahi chood tu jeyegaan…
Kaun hai ma baap aur kaun hai patni….
Sab hai rishtey lalach ke… yeh to jaan na payegaan
Phir bhi lalach badtha hi jayegaan, lekin ek din to enko bhi chod chala jayegaan…

Na koi saath aaya hai, na koi saath jayegaan…
Na koi saath aaya hai, na koi saath jayegaan…

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Life : A truth

Life…. A fact which everyone lives….. Sometimes even we don’t know where we are heading for but still we all are living…..

Don’t know we are living for ourselves or we are living for our loved ones…. But still we are living….. Don’t know other loves you or not, but still we are living……. What we will get out of our life … this is a blank question for everybody but still we are living…. I think the great word is HOPE not living a life as such ….as we hope and then live and then again hope and then live and one day we got confused that we hope more or we live more… don’t know still confused…..

If I recollect my memory and check that till today, how much time I spent as a happy person and how much life I spent in cursing myself and others for my failures, then I found that the ratio is very amazing…. I think 5% of my total life I spent till yet was consider as the happy one and 5% of life was the unhappy one… what about 90% of my life I spent till yet….. What I was doing during that time…. . I think I was doing something so that I will be happy rest of life…. By purchasing car, big house… list is too big…. But still many times my doings did not go with me and I ended up in sorrow…… really it sucks that just to get materialistic happiness I spend 90% of my life… that’s really bad……. So what is true happiness…..? hmmm… don’t know… what I wanted to be… hmmmm…. I want that after 10 years I should be at very good position … which position…. Hmmm… may be director or so in a company ….. What u will get at that point……? Which will make u happy…….. hmmmm…. Even after playing this role really my life will change?.... don’t know… then what about the CEO post….. still don’t know… so it means I am just running here and there and looking for the excuses that if I will get that position, I will be happy……. Many people think that if they become bill gates or Mukesh Ambani, then they will become happy… does it really so?...

I think these roles will only satisfy once internal ego which nobody accepted.. ..me too….. I don’t know whether I am an egoist or egotist but I accept that I have some part of either of two…… don’t know what I will do which will give me happiness… a happiness which is never ended… which last for lifelong…… I met with a little child on a place where he should not be at this small age… a cancer ward …. I went there to donate the blood. He was passing through the lot of pain during chemotherapy but after 2-3 days I saw him smiling…… but why I can’t be happy like him….. That kid is not earning a single penny … his parents are very poor and they can’t fulfill all his wishes… but still I found him happy …… it means that lovely heart and your thinking which makes you happy….
My last diwali, I spent with this child in cancer hospital…that child did not know whether he is going to live more than 3months or not… but still he is happy….. When I bought chocolates, cracker and fruits for him, he jumped like a pure soul… he was happy…. But I was also happy with him…. Why? Don’t know ……. And I think that it was the happiest diwali my life … the reason might be that the greatest happiness is in seeing others happy …… is it really true?…….. I think so as parents are happy seeing their children progress…… a true friend is happy to see his/her friends progress…… hmmmmm…….. So it means happiness is all about your internal thinking and views… but now a day’s most of people don’t like there friend, colleagues will grow… as we all are comparing ourselves with others…. How come this little guy earns so much…? How come he is maintaining a Big car?…. one day I will also purchase one and then I will be happy…… hmmm what’s that?.... don’t know ?..... But I think for sure the Big car will not give you the happiness…….
I think our elders are much happier than us…. Though they were not earning that much at their early stage of life what we are earning now…….. Still they are happy… why?..... As they are more polite and they use their job for earning so that they can fulfill their basic needs. …… they found happiness by spending time with their family, friends, loved ones….. Spent some quality time with their loved one make them happy……now a days we are spending our time on computer or LCD PLASMA TV (which we purchased from our hefty salaries) though we are complaining that we don’t have time to talk to our friends .. and one day the stress overtook us and then we again complained that I am not happy… don’t know why?............. might be that we are all Hippocrates… we know where we all are lagging somewhere but still we are running as we don’t want to come second… it does not matter even if our loved ones leaves behind…….. Basically we become a MISANTHROPE….

We all are running behind all those materialistic things and we think that we will get happiness out of that….. we think we are too intelligent and too smart but the fact is we are a dumb in front of the best player of this game, the name LIFE…….