Be a winner instead of a victim

With me, a lot of times, something undesirable happens and I start blaming people or circumstances just to make myself comfortable. I think of so many reasons to excuse myself and convince myself that I am not the one to blame. Sometimes, I even put the blame on my best friend, you call Him, God.

So, let’s see how I think and talk to myself:

– When the job market was bad, I said “I cannot find a job because of the bad job market. It’s tough to get a good package now.” I will wait for the job market to improve or wait for the next excuse I could think of. :)

– I am unhappy because my girl friend dumped me and I lost my job. I will just wait for some miracle to happen so that my girl friend and my job will come to me by its own.

– I lost the competition because the referee made a lousy call and gave some important points to my opponent. I lost interest and stopped playing. I will not play with those unfair people anymore.

– My love ones have lost faith in me. They think that I have let them down. They started believing on what others say. They don’t want to talk to me anymore. But why should it worry me. I have given my whole life for their sake. I don’t need to prove that I am right. I will not kneel down before anybody. I will not discuss any issue with them.

– If I can't think of any reason, I will simply think that my luck is bad. I will just wait for my luck to get better.


When you blame things on others, it makes you feel like a victim. You feel weak and powerless. You feel defeated. You feel like a victim of your destiny. Its fine to think of reasons. But if you take the responsibility of everything that happens to you (instead of blaming things on other people and circumstances) you will feel an immense power which will turn you from a victim into a winner. There is a lot of difference between taking the blame on youself and taking the responsibility. You never have to blame yourself for what is happening to you.

You don’t have the control on what happens to you but what distinguishes a winner from a loser is how you react to the things that happens to you. Someone has nicely define the 10:90 rule which states that you do not have control to the 10 percent of the things that happens to you but you have control on the 90 percent of what you do as you react to those situations. You have complete control on how you react to those things. Taking the responsibility makes you action oriented. You know it is you who have to do something about it instead of waiting for the situation or your luck to change. You will see your mind working toward the solution, towards making you a winner. You will be amazed with the power of your mind when you really want it to work for you.

Let’s see how your winner mind will think in the above situations when you take the responsibility,


– Job market is bad, I have to work harder to get a job.

– As my girl friend is not with me and I have lost my job, I have to find another girl friend and a job. Am I right? Better leave the girl friend, yes? But definitely, I will go find a job. :)

– I will work harder and will give my best. Losing and winning is part of life but giving your best is what matters. I have to work on my weak points. I have to point out if the referee is wrong and giving favor to opponent because of some reason. This would help prevent it from happening again, not only to me but to other players. Loosing the game has increase the adrenaline level in my blood. I will work hard.

– My love ones are my well wishers. They are disturbed as I am disturbed. They are sad as I am sad. They love me so much. It's just a bad phase of life. Talk to them and discuss my issues with them. Listen to them peacefully. Take some time and give others some time. One day, truth will prevail. Wait for the right time. The loved ones will become one soon.

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. (1 Cor. 13:4-8 NIV)

So from this time onward, when you see yourself thinking or talking about your excuses to put the blame on others, stop it right away. Irrespective of what situation you are in, take the responsibility of your life, take charge of your life and be a winner!!

As, rightly said by someone "Tough times don’t last but tough people do."

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. (James 1:2-4 NIV)

Are You Going To Finish Strong

hey doston...

I hope everybody is doing good .... may be not like me but better :)

One of friend sent me one link today and I really liked it too much ...

so I thought I should share this will you all as well...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VdsVA90QFck

Life is Beautiful: Am I Joking :)

I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I've aged, I've become kinder to myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend. I don't chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying that silly cement gecko that I didn't need, but looks so avant garde on my patio. I am entitled to a treat, to be messy, to be extravagant.

I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.
Whose business is it if I choose to read or play on the computer until 4 AM and sleep until noon? I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 60 &70's, and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love ... I will.


I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the jet set. They, too, will get old.

I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten. And I eventually remember the important things.
Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when somebody's beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.


I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face.

So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn silver.


As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don't question myself anymore. I've even earned the right to be wrong.

So, to answer your question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be. And I shall eat dessert every single day(if I feel like it).

Hey what r u waiting for .... DESSERTS... sorry man..... Hard luck... I already had it all :)

enjoy... Life is beautiful.... yup .. that's true man....




ITS NOT MINE.... :):):):)... like it so post it... copy and paste :):);)